As little girls, we’re taught so many things. There are the lessons our parents mean to teach us: how to tie our shoes, how to read & write and so on. And then there are the lessons our parents teach us without realizing: what love looks like, how to love our bodies and how to treat money. We’re always learning no matter who and what is going on around us.
So when we get to be adults, in a society with a strong love for social media and sharing overly curated lives, we are told even more what things should look like. We go from parents who teach us how we should feel to people who don’t know or necessarily care about our best interests telling us how to feel. Or so it seems.
How do you break out of that mold of what society tells you is right? How do you learn to love your body in a way that goes beyond the scale or your jean size? For the last few months, I’ve been on a journey of learning to love my body. I wanted to break free of the mindsets that had taken such a strong hold in my life. And while it’s still a work in progress, it’s one I want to share today. Because no matter who you are or where you are in life, you deserve to be happy and learn to love yourself in the moment you’re in.
Happiness Is A Choice, Not A Destination
The first thing you need to know before you start any journey is that delaying happiness doesn’t guarantee happiness. There are so many people who thought they would be happier once they lost the weight. They thought their lives would transform and everything would change. And guess what? It didn’t.
I knew that if I wanted to learn to love my body, I needed to start right here, right now. I had to learn to love myself as a person and choose to find happiness in something that isn’t going to fluctuate so much. Someday, I hope to have children. And if I decided that I could only love my body in this state, what would happen to me after I’ve brought this amazing life into the world?
You have to choose to build happiness in the space you’re in now. The journey to your dreams, whether it’s your body, your career or the love of your life, is going to be tough. If you want the best, you’re going to have to work for it and you’re also going to realize not everyone is going to join you for the journey. Choose to be happy in the space you’re in now. I chose to learn to love my body in this moment. You can too.
My Opinion Needs To Matter More Than Others
I need you to understand something. If you spend your life letting everyone else’s opinion in your life matter more than your own, you’re NEVER going to be happy. People’s thoughts and opinions change with the wind. And if you’re staking your emotional stability on what they think is important, you’re going to be on the worst roller coaster ride of your life.
When I decided to love my body, I realized I had to do it on my own terms. I had to decide what it meant daily to learn to love my body. For me, it means eating in a way that balances my hormones, gives me energy and helps me reach my goals. It means I decided to change my habits because I wanted to love myself enough to change my life.
Learning to love your body may not look the same as someone else. And that’s perfectly okay! But you have to decide what it looks like in your life without anyone else’s opinion have a stronger hold than your own. It’s your body. Your life. Time to start taking ownership of it.
YOUR WORDS TO YOUR BODY MATTER
Have you ever considered how much you love yourself? Like on a daily basis, how do you talk to you? What do you say and speak into your own life? Do you really love you?
I don’t think I hated myself before this journey began. But I also don’t think I really knew how to love myself. My desire to love and help everyone else meant I put myself on the back burner for a while. And we know I love to say, you can’t pour from an empty cup. If I wanted to love others truly, I needed to learn how to love my body and myself first.
So what words are you speaking over yourself daily? Do you tell yourself that you’re beautiful? that you’re worthy? that you’re proud of you? How are you training your mind to love your body? If you want to change your life, you have to change your mind. Your words matter. And if you want to go from a place of comparison and pain, you’ve got to start talking to yourself and your body like you would your best friend. WITH LOVE.
WORK WITH WHAT YOU’VE GOT NOT AGAINST IT
As this point, I would like to thank the Kardashians for making curves fashionable. JK. That was JLO. But still. At this moment in time, I’m a petite, curvy gal. I have no idea what I weigh. Jeans are always a fun guessing game to shop for. And I’ve realized I will most likely never have a body without curves. I’M OKAY WITH THIS.
If you have curves, awesome! If you have big boobs, natural or otherwise, awesome! If you’ve got legs for days, thank you for existing because I need friends like you to reach the top shelf because I’m short, but awesome! Stop wishing you had some other life and work with what you’ve got. And if you really want it, find a way to make it happen. Obviously, long legs would be painful and I have no idea if you can have surgery for that. But that’s besides the point.
Instead of hating myself and my body because I don’t look like Kendall Jenner, I choose to love my body in all it’s petite glory. I’ve chosen to gear my workouts towards enhancing a figure I already love into something I love more. I refuse to hate myself because I don’t look like the cover on some magazine. Who cares. However, I can choose to follow women who love their bodies, inspire me to be healthier and enjoy the figure I’ve been blessed with. Stop fighting against your body and start working with it.
TAKE OWNERSHIP OF YOUR BODY
Have you ever wanted something so badly as a kid that when you got it, you treated it like it was a treasure? It was YOUR toy. Well guess what? It’s time to love YOUR body. Let’s say that again: it’s YOUR body. Not the president’s, not the man who cat calls you on the street and not the person who judged you in 8th grade during your awkward phase. It’s yours.
I love my body because it’s simply that MY body. There was definitely a time in there that I didn’t realize I could claim ownership of something I lived in and used daily. It just felt like this thing that I had. I didn’t put to much effort into it because that seemed like a lot of work. And it kind of functioned okay on it’s own. So why mess up a good thing, right? WRONG.
Part of my journey of becoming a powerful woman who empowers other women and doesn’t shy away from the pain meant I had to take ownership. I had to take ownership of my life, my emotions, my wants, my desires and my body. It could no longer just be a thing. I needed to realize just how important it was in my life and how much happier I could be if I stopped pretending I didn’t care.
It’s your body. It’s time to wake up and take the reigns back. It’s time to get happy and learn to love your body. You are worthy. You are loved. And you deserve to live a life where you love the body you’re living in.
I’d love to know where you’re at in the journey to love your body. Is there something you feel like has helped you along the way? Or is there something you feel like you’re struggling with? Please leave me a comment below and let me know. And be sure to share this point with someone you think might need to read it. Until next time. Xoxo, Savvy
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